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MatchMatrix Modifiers | Found in the Relationship Report

MatchMatrix has identified five critical Personality Modifiers. A person can have none, one or a combination of modifiers in their personality. Each modifier offers both benefits and challenges to the individual.

The effects of the modifiers are most obvious in close, personal relationships, particularly intimate romantic relationships. Each are integral to the personality and have a unique impact that is magnified and complicated when multiple modifiers are in play and the MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits are not well matched. Purchasing a MatchMatrix Relationship Report will tell you exactly which modifiers you posses, as well as those of the other person you are testing your compatibility with. This is tremendously helpful in understanding any obstacles that stand between you and a harmonious relationship.

The Five MatchMatrix personality modifiers are:

Awareness and understanding of these Personality Modifiers will help you work out differences when the challenging aspects of a personality shows up.

The greatest impact from the modifiers is in physically close relationships:

The effects of the Personality Modifiers are most apparent in physically "close" relationships. Such relationships include intimate, family, roommates and close working and professional relationships. The issues that follow from a close relationship typically do not surface in friendships, casual relationships or during the courting stage of a relationship. They are often the source of what people identify as "the other personality" that surfaces later on in a close relationship. The full effect of the modifier is apparent after the initial chemistry of attractions has worn off.

The challenging side of the Modifiers will be lessened by choosing a mate with whom you share the same MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits. In existing relationships, alignment in the Four Lifestyle Traits will have a profound impact on the effects of Modifiers.

The Five Personality Modifiers:

Some aspects of each Modifier have a similar effect on men and women while other elements affect them differently.

Achiever modifier ("Can redirect their emotional energy to achieve goals")

The Achiever modifier gives its possessor the unique ability to redirect 100% of their emotional energy into accomplishing their personal and business goals. That means the emotional connection with their mate can be severed for the time of the project. People with this Modifier are typically successful.

Often times people in relationship with an Achiever suffers from emotional malnutrition because of the emotional disconnect. The stress which is reflected primarily in their sexual relationship can manifest as jealousy and control issues. The best way to avoid the emotional stress from this Modifier is for both people to have the Achiever modifier. When this is the case, they have commonality or a level playing field for the relationship. They will share the sexual philosophy of "when you're hot you're hot; when you're not you're not". If one person has the Achiever modifier then, at a minimum, a couple should be aligned for the same MatchMatrix sexual response to diminish the sexual stress.

To understand how this modifier may affect your own relationships, order a Relationship Report today!

Controller modifier ("My way or the Highway")

Men and Women with this trait are very sensitive and highly intuitive. They are respected for their self-confidence and are often approached for advice because of the accuracy of their intuitive sense. Those gifts, however, are rarely available for their personal use. They make good decisions, are usually successful, can be quick witted, decisive and have iron wills. They have the personal power to accomplish a lot. They have a loving and compassionate nature when they are not operating under the effect of this modifier.

Under its influence, a person with the Controller modifier is only interested in giving and not receiving. "Only giving" can be a powerful control technique. Being aware of this Modifier and breaking its effect can be a real challenge.

The Controller modifier can manifest as a Dr. Jekyll/ Mr. Hyde personality. The person is often moody. Their emotional state can change in a second with great emotional highs and lows that can range from wanting to be left alone to exploding over a minor issue. They can roll out a canon to blow up anthills.

Under the effect of this modifier, they can be temperamental, dogmatic and not open to learning except on their terms. They may isolate themselves emotionally because it offers the best control. A person with this trait can be loved and respected in the world while at home they can be reclusive or a tyrant. They can be short tempered and attack without provocation. Compared to how they normally act, they seem to be under a spell. There is no feedback system for them to know how they are acting. They may not even remember what occurred during that time.

Men: In a man, the Controller Modifier is based on an underlying paranoia. The timing of the impact of this Modifier generally tracks their biorhythms. Paranoia can be highly motivating or it can defeat him at every turn. For that reason, men with this modifier can be financially successful or have little to show for their efforts. If he is successful, it is because he maintains control by working harder than anyone else. Success follows naturally from always being ahead of the game. The other extreme is someone who takes regular breaks from normal responsibilities. He has a low tolerance for stress and needs to escape, which typically defeats his financial ambitions.

Women: This Modifier will affect a Women's emotional nature more acutely during their monthly cycles. Its influence also generally tracks with their biorhythms. Approximately three to five days each month the Modifier exerts its greatest influence.

During those days in particular, she may have a difficult time letting things go. Because of her sensitive nature, each confrontation, each misunderstanding or disappointment is a nick that draws a drop of blood. The wound doesn't heal because she does not know how to let it go. These minor issues in a relationship can accumulate over time and cause death by a thousand cuts.

The Controller Modifier has its greatest impact when the person is tired or under stress. The effect can range from mild to severe. In some cases the person can transform into an entirely different person right before your eyes. It can give a stainless steel lining to a personality. The person can be pretty closed minded while under the effect of the Modifier. Their intuitive sense or gut feeling is the only thing that counts. It's best to just step aside in a conflict and wait for the effect of the Modifier to pass.

When your relationship is stable, you might gently work out a plan together for small signals that may let you both know when lines are crossed. Treat this as a feedback system that can slide under those emotional outbursts to disarm them. Stay well-rested, remember to exercise together and have fun together. This will help keep both of you free of stress.

The major challenge for both men and women who have the Controller Modifier is to be aware of what is going on while they are under its influence.

The Controller Modifier is most beneficial in public or casual relationships. In an intimate relationship it presents difficult challenges when it lacks the mitigating benefits of the Lifestyle Traits identified by MatchMatrix. The magic of MatchMatrix is having a way to know if you or someone you love has the Modifier and to understand its effect. A new source of love, support and understanding are available from this knowledge. We strongly recommend a Relationship Report to identify this modifier and allow you to take informed action.

People with the Controller modifier will benefit from partnering with someone with whom they share the same MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits. Having the emotional alignments will lessen stress in the relationship and moderate the effect of the Controller Modifier.

Engager Modifier ("Charisma")

The Engager modifier gives the person a charismatic personality and usually a brightness to their demeanor. They easily draw people to them because they are approachable, friendly and enjoy connecting with other people. They present themselves with style, self-confidence and, as a result, they usually enjoy a wide variety of friends. The Engager modifier is most often a valuable benefit to the person. It is a "door opening" advantage that compliments the four MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits.

Consider the effect of the Engager when someone also has other modifiers. If they also have the Controller modifier the Engager may give a slickness to their personality. It sets the stage for the con man or puts a velvet cover on the hammer that characterizes the Controller. The Engager certainly furthers the cause of the Manipulator modifier in its ability to make people feel good about being worked.

The Engager is complimentary to the Achiever to supports the person accomplishing their goals. The Engager smooths out the affect of the Perfectionist modifier. The Perfectionist is often a loner who has a hard time committing to a relationship. The Engager dimension to their personality opens the door to new possibilities. People are drawn to them so their opportunities for many different kinds of relationships are enhanced. Their loner characteristic will be alleviated.

It's very helpful to know if someone in your life has the Engager modifier, or if you do. Get a Relationship Report to find out if its influence is affecting your interpersonal dynamics!

Manipulator Modifier ("Tiger in the tank")

A Person with the Manipulator modifier exercises an attractive kind of control. They are good at finessing other people to get what they want. They're very amiable and know how to cozy up to people. This modifier works well for developing casual relationships and the other person feels good about being directed. People with this Modifier get things done and are usually respected.

Women with the Manipulator modifier:

Are power-houses.
Benefited from feminism.
Usually have a drive towards success.
Maintain control through their sexuality.
Have no continuity in their emotional make up.
Typically have success except in their relationships.
Think like a man and compete well in a man's world.
Are seductive and control by manipulation and finesse.
Are good at what they do and have a lot of energy to do it.

Women with this modifier face a significant challenge. They like having a strong partner who challenges them. When the man finally yields, however, she may see that as a weakness and conclude that the relationship is no longer fun without a contest. If neither person yields, they can end up head to head like two locomotives pushing each other up and down the same track. Someone has to yield to make it work. With the capability of these women, it makes sense for the guy to yield. Without this understanding, one of them will most likely leave the relationship. Women with this Modifier may cycle through many relationships looking for the right mate. There is a good chance they may just tire of the process and stop looking altogether before reaching their goal.

This modifier can cause a surge of wild passion one night and then transform to ice the next night. They like a good fight, never forget a wrong, carry grudges and can write someone out of their life forever.

Men with the Manipulator modifier:

• Typically have many creative ideas. Their challenge is implementation. They can be good entrepreneurs if they are able to put together a team or back-office to further develop and implement their ideas. Without that support they typically have many false starts and their ideas fail to produce results.

• They can have a style that ranges from assertive to aggressive. They like high risks. They like poker, extreme sports, fast cars, venture capital and making deals. They are drawn to being policeman, fireman, stockbrokers, sports figures and Olympians. They work out, play hard, talk fast, drive fast and enjoy high-risk, quick return deals in the financial arena.

• They often have a cool emotional nature. They bring their work and problems home with them. That behavior often conflicts with their ability to fulfill the emotional needs of their partner. Work comes first and gets their emotional attention. Someone with this Modifier often lacks the compassion necessary to provide quality support to their partner. These challenges are seldom apparent during the early days of a relationship. They blossom after the commitments are made. Sharing the MatchMatrix lifestyle traits will mitigate the effects of this Modifier.

In order to thrive in a relationship with people who have this Modifier it is important that you have at least the same Communication Style and Sexual Response. A Relationship Report is essential to understand your compatibility with a partner or potential partner so you'll know what will work in your favor and what will not. Click here to purchase one now.

People with this modifier do best when they are in control. However, while in control they must learn that kindness does not represent weakness. At any point in time one person has to be more assertive and the other receptive if the couple is to grow together. Otherwise, the relationship resembles rubbing two diamonds together—they can only scratch each other. Compromise will be the key to gaining traction when the horsepower of the Manipulator Modifier is spinning its wheels. In other words, if one of you is jumping up and down the other one must stand still.

When a woman with the Manipulator modifier finds a man with whom she is aligned in the MatchMatrix traits, her need to control will be mitigated. Without the need to draw on this modifier for her protection, she will be able to present her best qualities to find fulfilling happiness.

Men with this Modifier will also benefit from MatchMatrix. Sharing the emotional alignments of this system provide the necessary tools to work out the challenges presented by this Modifier. The stabilizing influence of aligned emotional traits will free a man to present the best he has to offer to his partner.

However, even when two people with the Manipulator modifier are aligned in the MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits, they will have to work together to make compromises. The alignments of the MatchMatrix provide the most predictable way for these people to have a good relationship through the awareness of their personality differences and mutual efforts to accommodate them.

The "Controller" and "Manipulator" are powerful modifiers. If a couple is unaware oif their presence, they can have a dramatic impact on a relationship even with the benefit of their MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits being in harmony. The inherent need to control that accompanies these modifiers can keep a person stuck unless they are willing to look, to learn and to grow. Ordering a Relationship Report is a great first step!

Perfectionist Modifier ("The Internal Friction")

The Perfectionist modifier creates a conflict in the person's own personality that creates friction with all of their contemporaries. Being a perfectionist also provides a unique source of energy for focus, creativity and success. Only 15% of the population has the Perfectionist modifier. This discussion applies to both men and women.

Challenges of the Perfectionist trait:

If the Perfectionist went straight through school for 12, 16 or 20 years they were in "conflict" with all of their classmates over the entire time. They may have had friends and participated in events, but they rarely felt like they belonged. They did not fit into their peer group. They were often social misfits and may have been loners. They typically felt more comfortable with older or younger people who were outside the age range of their internal friction.
The emotional disconnect caused by this modifier can be extreme. These people may have few emotional ties with their own gender, and sex may be the primary connection with the opposite gender. The solution for this issue may also be extreme. They need to reframe their relationships with other people to consciously reclaim their place in the human race.
People with the Perfectionist modifier experience little satisfaction with what they accomplish. Their state of mind is "let's get onto the next thing."
They often prefer to work alone and develop their own techniques for problem solving.
This modifier magnifies the conflicts caused by emotional misalignments in relationships. Conflicts that result from misalignments in the MatchMatrix personality traits can have a much greater impact on the relationship than would normally be expected.
Perfectionists have difficulty letting go of their point of view for the sake of compromise.
The Perfectionist trait can keep a person stuck on a project because nothing is ever good enough to get their stamp of approval.
Being so highly committed can also be debilitating. It can cause so much stress as to color every aspect of their life and personality. They become workaholics, leaving little room or time to develop other sides of their personality. If they were to look back into their childhood, they could probably identify a strong commitment and decision they made so long ago that still binds them today. With recognition of their iron-clad childhood commitments, they may discover what is controlling how they function as an adult.

Benefits of the Perfectionist Modifier:

People with this modifier have a powerful drive for success. They are willing to pay the price to achieve high quality results. They are totally committed to the project at hand and show unequaled tenacity and resiliency.
Their perfectionist nature affects how they work and how they apply themselves to any area of interest. They produce a quality product.
They are emotionally sensitive. They know what it's like to be on the outside socially, so they often develop compassion and understanding. They typically have a strong humanitarian side.
People with the Perfectionist Modifier seem to have built-in radar to connect with other people with this trait. Sharing this trait creates a bonding tie. The bonding effect is significant enough that it can maintain a relationship when there is little else to support it.
The Perfectionist desires to have a partner in their lives but they usually cannot identify what they're looking for in the other person. They are often attracted to people who are not attracted to them and vice versa. They often have multiple marriages and divorces.

Consider the challenge a Perfectionist faces in intimate relationships. During their formative years, they felt disconnected from all of their contemporaries and were confused about how to relate to the world. That model of experience did not change when they fell in love. Their challenge is to find a way to transcend the feeling of separateness, to be able to trust and be committed to the relationship.

People with the Perfectionist modifier will benefit from meeting people in their MatchMatrix group. By providing a high level of compatibility, the Matrix Lifestyle traits will soften the impact of the perfectionist nature they have felt all their lives.

The Perfectionist modifier is randomly distributed throughout the population. To find out if your or someone close to you is affected by this modifier, order a Relationship Report now.

Does your child have the Perfectionist modifier?

Knowing that your child has the Perfectionist modifier will create greater understanding and compassion. This modifier gives your child a unique point of view that may be difficult for you to understand. Here are some suggestions for counseling children about their perfectionist nature:

Encourage them to be friends with older or younger people. Perhaps there are activities that will introduce them to people outside the age range of their contemporaries.
Is there is a way to keep them back or have them skip a grade to avoid the age range of the friction? By the time they are ready for college, introduce the idea again of considering a one year break between high school and college to move away from their contemporaries. Being in a new group of people where they are free from the memories of past friction will give them a chance to grow, make new friends and consciously reshape their environment to produce new and more rewarding results.
Even if you think it's important for their development, don't push your perfectionist child into activities or social situations where they are uncomfortable. They'll catch up on their own.
Another way to see beyond perfectionism is to gently and firmly coach your child to stop criticizing themselves for every little real or imagined mistake. They need to know that there are many good ways to accomplish a goal. They can stop pressuring themselves to be perfect.
Tell them to let the past go. Put regrets aside. Whatever decisions they made were for good reasons. They can quit beating themselves up for the past. Teach them to acknowledge the circumstances of the decisions and to focus on new goals and fresh ideas. This may sound like good advice for everyone, however, it applies in a unique way to people with the Perfectionist modifier. They typically want to "fall on the dagger" as their first line of defense.
Internal Friction is an overriding influence in the person's life. Try to imagine their hypersensitivity if they lack closeness and real communication with one of their parents.
An endless chain of misunderstandings, irritations and conflicts characterize the childhood of a person with this modifier. They can end up blaming and bashing their parents for all misunderstandings.
Help them understand the two sides to being a perfectionist. First, they can turn out a terrific product because of their willingness to get it right at all costs. Second, know when it is time to let something go due to the practicalities of meeting deadlines and living life in the real world.
Show them there is a time for fun, for humor and for just laughing and playing. Spontaneous water balloon games on a hot summer day, a surprise snowball fight in the middle of a tedious project can lighten the load on the perfectionist.

If your think your child may have the Perfectionist modifier, order a Relationship Report to find out!

Summary

The modern world of conscious, mature people who want substantive guidance so they can have more fun will love using MatchMatrix as a tool for inquiry.

MatchMatrix provides a new understanding to married people. Its capability to clearly distinguish the effects of the four traits, especially sexual alignment, is unique to this system. It can also help parents to understand and connect with their children.

One important gift of MatchMatrix to existing relationships is a clear profile of the inherent differences between people. Until now, we could only deal with those differences within the limits of our own individual emotional toolbox. MatchMatrix provides an expanded perspective, allowing us to understand the underlying reasons for our differences as the basis for resolution. Realizing that these forces are natural and experienced by many others is a reminder that your conflicts are normal. You are not alone.

Equally transformative is the ability to accept another person the way they are. Acceptance leads to compassion. Simply knowing the differences between people can create huge breakthroughs in any relationship.

Choosing to be in a relationship with someone whose Lifestyle Traits are aligned with you is a worthy goal. Understanding the effect of those traits and paying attention in your relationship will smooth out the effect of the Modifiers.

Imagine being in a relationship with someone who shares your MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits. They accept you for who you are. There is a flow and ease to the relationship that makes it easy to work out your differences. The agendas disappear and you no longer have to walk on egg shells or plan your next conversation. Everything is spontaneous and fun. You enjoy the same humor and laughter is your primary connection. Your best traits come to the surface to complement the response from your partner. You nurture each other and celebrate all the things that make you exactly who you are.

If your haven't tried a Relationship Report yet, now is the time to test our system! If our insights into your relationship with another person aren't helpful to you, email us within 30 days of purchase for your money back - no questions asked.