Are Your Attractions in Relationships True or False?
Do any of these statements sound familiar?
"I'll know if we have a chance from the first time we meet."
"It's all chemistry baby, without that there is no way!"
"The first time we held hands I knew he was the one"
"We had it, but then the feelings just disappeared."
"He (she) loves me too much and I just don't feel the same."
"She (he) is the best person I have ever met, but the spark is just not there."
Chemistry! Attractions! Turn-on!
What is the source of the spark that draws one person to another?
Millions of hours and dollars are spent looking for an answer to the source of attractions. Where does chemistry come from? Why one person and not another? If it was there and now it is gone, where did it go?
Every major dating site, therapist, counselor and coach has attempted to give us direction. But, not until MatchMatrix has there been a solid answer with solid direction.
For the first time ever, MatchMatrix has discovered a way to identify the source of attractions. The MatchMatrix system, however, answers a more important question, "Will your attractions lead you to the people with whom you can share a long-term attraction?" In other words, can you follow your heart in deciding whom to date? And if you are in a committed relationship, can you rely on your attractions for support and longevity?
The Power of Attractions
An attraction can override every other part of a relationship. Common sense goes out the window and many of the lessons learned in past relationships are simply forgotten. People hope that the good feelings will last forever.
The cornerstones of a relationship are the 4 MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits. The closer you're aligned with a partner in the four traits the greater the chance for a harmonious long-term relationship. Misalignments of the traits are the source of many challenges and contribute to most failed relationships. Powerful attractions can have a downside. They can mask misalignments or they can steer us into relationships that are in jeopardy from the start.
The fact is people don't really change in a relationship. The misalignments of the traits are there from the beginning. The attractions are like frosting and the traits are the cake. The attractions give a sugar rush, but we need the cake to stabilize the attractions to make them real and long term. The emotional misalignments of different Lifestyle Traits surface after the attractions deteriorate to challenge the relationship. That's when the honeymoon is over and people start "working" on their relationship.
All Attractions Are Not Created Equal
The most important issue about attractions is their reliability. Can a person trust that their attractions will be True and they can be relied on to lead to the right people for a long-term relationship; or will their attractions be False and because of their unreliability condemn them to the rut of successive failed relationships?
How Does MatchMatrix Define the Difference in Attractions?
The relationship of your Energetic Attraction Pattern (EAP) determined by MatchMatrix with the EAP of your opposite gender birth parent determines your attractions in intimate relationships, in friendships, to family members and in business relationships. In response to this idea, women often say, "Yes, the men I'm attracted to are tall and good looking just like my father." In fact, the attractions have nothing to do with physical appearance. They are the result of the emotional imprint from the opposite gender parent at the DNA level. The quality of the relationship a person shared with their opposite parent has no effect, nor does it matter if a person even knew their parents. That emotional imprint is made at birth and determines your attractions.
Are Your Attractions True or False?
A comparison of your Energetic Attraction Pattern™ (EAP) with the EAP of your opposite gender parent determines the reliability of your attractions. If you have the same Energetic Attraction Pattern (EAP) as your opposite gender parent you have "True Attractions” and will be attracted to someone with whom you are energetically aligned. If your attractions are true you can follow your heart in selecting whom to date and your attractions will continue to support a long-term relationship after the initial courtship is past.
If your communication style is the same as your opposite gender parent you have "true" attractions and will be attracted to someone with whom you share the same communication style. If your attractions are true you can follow your heart in selecting whom to date and your attractions will continue to support a long-term relationship after the initial courtship is past.
If you do not have the same Energetic Attraction Pattern (EAP) as your opposite gender parent your innate attraction will be to someone with a different EAP than your own. That is a "False Attraction." The attraction will be intense and short term, and it will actually draw you into a relationship with someone with whom you are not energetically aligned. The attraction feels so "right" that you follow it blindly until the energetic differences that are masked by the Attraction surface to seriously challenge the relationship. “False Attractions” create the phenomenon of being attracted to the wrong person over and over again. A "False Attraction” will lead you into relationships that result in painful turmoil, conflict and very often, failure.
There Are Two Significant Challenges When You Have False Attractions.
The attraction can feel like an addiction. A couple can claim to be "in love" even though it is apparent to everyone that the relationship is disintegrating around them. Even after the relationship has deteriorated into conflicts caused by their energetic misalignments, people will keep coming back to each other to try and recreate the powerful connection they felt at the beginning. It is like driving a car while looking in the rear view mirror. They keep their eye focused on recovering the wonderful feelings they had in the past. That is the wrong place to look while driving forward. The pain of hitting the wall again and again becomes their most reliable teacher.
If You Have a True Attraction You Should Definitely "Follow Your Heart".
If your Attractions are True, make sure your partner really turns you on. That "hot all over feeling" should be your guide. By having True Attractions you will have the same Energetic Attraction Pattern (EAP) as the person you are attracted to. Even with True Attractions, the MatchMatrix system is still very important to you. Use it to make sure you also have the same Sexual Response and preferably the same Activity Level to provide the cake for the relationship. Being aligned for Financial Logic is desirable but not as critical as the other traits because you can hire someone to help you with financial issues..
What if Your Attractions Are True and Your Partner's Are Not?
If you are in a relationship with a person that has False Attractions, it is critically important to be aware of their innate tendency to feel disconnected from time to time. The strength of your True Attraction plays an important role in helping your partner stay emotionally connected in the relationship.
It is important to be aware that the strength of your True Attraction can push your partner away if you force the certainty you feel upon them. They may feel controlled and confined. They will want to protect themselves or run away and will not understand totally why. They may love you, your MatchMatrix Lifestyle Traits may be aligned and they may still feel something is missing.
Let the strength of your True Attractions be a pillar or a beacon of light so your partner will know where to look and return to. If you chase or force your certainty on them it will create a rift that is hard to repair. When you allow your True Attraction to emerge without expectation or control, your partner will feel the power of the connection.
What if My Attractions are False?
If your attractions are false and are energetically aligned with your partner, you may feel a connection but it is often not the emotional turn-on of the strong feeling of an attraction. You may be attracted to their mind or feel that the two of you share the same values. The strength and quality of the other person's attraction can also be enough to carry the relationship. Whatever is the source of the connection, you may find yourself questioning the relationship, as you feel pulled away because of the missing turn-on you felt in the past from the False Attraction.
This may be challenging for you to accept, but you should choose to ignore your False Attractions and substitute the guidance offered by MatchMatrix. This guidance will direct you to people with whom you are energetically aligned by having the same Style of Communication, Activity Level, Sexual Response and Financial Logic. Sharing those Lifestyle Traits will give you a new quality of attraction that comes from growing emotionally together and will support a long-term relationship.